Two Steps Forward
by FallenRose24
Summary: A oneshot inspired by the Season 9 premiere. Spoiler warning! Arizona moves forward down the road of her recovery and finds Callie waiting for her at the end.


She could hear him shuffling around in front of her, though her eyes were trained to the plain wall on her right. He jostled her occasionally and apologized each time as if he thought he had hurt her… as if he thought she could feel anything. They all acted like that – as if she hadn't lost her leg and somehow could still feel all the way down to her nonexistent toes – but the truth was that she had lost her leg in a cruel twist of fate. Her gazed flickered only briefly to the seemingly small form of her wife on the other end of the room. She was burning a stare into the oddly colored tile at her feet.

Feet. Plural.

How lucky was she?

"Okay, I think we're all good to go." The happiness in his voice made her want to vomit. "This looks like a great fit. You know your wife really pushed for us to use the best material."

Her eyes shifted to his optimistic expression before falling down to where her left leg should have been lying on the bed. She anticipated seeing empty space or seeing some sort of contraption that only half resembled a limb, but this time… this time she saw skin and muscle. It looked real. Her eyes widened in silence as she reached out to touch it and for a moment, she could swear she felt the touch of her fingers on the foreign thigh.

"How…"

Her physical therapist placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Dr. Torres has done a lot for our department since the crash. The amount of time and money she poured into designing artificial limbs… well, this is the best model that came out of that. Pretty real, right?"

Her eyes shifted to Callie once more who still refused to meet her gaze. She had done this? After all the screaming and the regretted words of hate? After she had tried to break her? Her heart swelled with an unimaginable wave of guilt and love that crashed over her in a sudden shock. The woman at the far end of the room was suddenly not the reason she didn't have a leg. No, she was a beaten down scapegoat who was still holding on, waiting for the moment when her wife would wake up and remember her.

Such a beautiful tragedy…

"Arizona?" The therapist caught her attention once more. "Want to try standing on it?"

She nodded and allowed him to help her off the bed, her eyes still shifting to Callie at every chance. It was almost as if she could feel the toes touching the cold ground, the muscles working to push bones forward so she could make it to the support railing along the wall. It was remarkable and as she looked down at the beautiful work her wife had done, she felt tears well in her eyes. She didn't deserve it. After months of telling that incredible woman that she was to blame, after months of shunning her, leaving her to suffer silently the loss of her best friend and wife – her family, why had she still done something like this to save her?

"We'll take it slow, but eventually you'll be walking on that like a champ! You won't even feel the difference."

Callie. She had to get to her, to wipe that dejected look off her face, to hold her in her arms again. Each step brought her closer; each surprised shout from her therapist tightened her resolve until her wife turned to look at her in shock. Almost instantly, the Latina moved forward, reaching to steady her as she faltered against the walking rail.

"Calliope…"

It was a broken call that ended with Arizona in her arms, tears pouring from tired blue eyes. She grasped at her lover's scrubs and lab coat, attempting to draw herself closer. It had been months since she had been held like this, since she had listened to the steadying beat of her wife's heart, since she had felt those soft hands thread through her hair with such affection.

"Moron, you shouldn't push yourself." Her voice was like chocolate, melting on her lips.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry." It was all she could choke out before the tears became overwhelming.

"Shh, it's okay. I've got you, sweetheart." Callie saw the therapist approach with a startled look on his face. "I've got it from here, Josh."

He nodded his head in understanding and left them in their embrace. Once the door had latched shut, Callie pulled her wife back, staring into reddened eyes and brushing aside the tears that still streamed down her pale cheeks. A day before, Arizona wouldn't even look at her, but now?

"Arizona, what-"

"I love you."

God, it had been so long since she had heard that.

"I was terrible… you… I was so terrible to you and you're still here… you didn't leave."

She wrapped the smaller woman back in her arms and carefully guided them to the floor, taking care to not damage or dislodge the prosthetic.

"I promised you that I wouldn't. I promised you forever, Arizona, and I meant it."

Her gaze shifted back to the fake limp, the new addition to her body, and she felt in that moment that she had never seen something so beautiful before. A gentle, tentative kiss was pressed to her dimpled cheek. She hated how hesitant she had made Callie, but she loved the affection nonetheless.

"Do you like it?"

Her eyes never drifted from the leg. "It's incredible - you're incredible."

Their embraced tightened as Callie pressed her lips against her ear. "I broke my promise to you once-"

"No, Callie." She turned to press a finger against full lips and silence the apology, but her hand was intercepted.

"I broke my promise to you... this is me asking you to forgive me..."

Her heart ached at the pain she saw reflected in brown eyes - something she had denied herself of seeing for too long.

"There's nothing to forgive." She placed a hand against a tear-marred, tan cheek.

"I tried, Arizona... I tried so hard to come up with a way for them to save it... but I... I failed."

"No."

"I failed. I let them take your leg after you begged me... I just..."

Arizona drew her in, pressing the broken woman's face against her chest. How long had she been forced to keep these tears at bay? How long had she been forced to live with the agony of the crash on her own? She did this. She turned her back on her wife and this is what it got her.

"When did you start working on this?"

Callie sniffed loudly against her shirt. "When I first saw you in the hospital."

She was floored.

"You knew?"

"I did." Brown eyes met blue. "But you made me promise, so I tried. I knew it wouldn't work, so I tried to make sure you would have the best chance in the end."

"Even after everything I did?"

Callie pressed her nose against her pale neck and breathed in her familiar scent. "I never blamed you."

"No, but I did."

"I forgive you."

Arizona simply held her tighter in response. What could she say? She had been forgiven for the months of hate she had wrongly thrown at her wife, for the days she had tried to break her just so she might actually feel something, and yet, was it enough? Could she forgive herself? Looking down at the dark locks splayed across her chest, she leaned in and graced them with a soft kiss.

"Why?"

The younger surgeon shifted out of their embrace so that she could hold Arizona's face in her hands. She didn't speak for what felt like hours, letting the seconds pass between them as their eyes sought so many answers. Finally, she let her lips fall open, but her gaze never faltered in its conviction to make the blonde woman hear every word.

"Because you came back to me."

She couldn't hold herself back anymore as the words blanketed her with the warming hope that the life they loved was within their reach. She threaded her fingers in the dark hair she adored and brought her lips to Callie's in a passionate kiss. Her wife startle for a fraction of a second before wrapping strong arms around her waist and slipping a willing tongue between her lips as they dueled for dominate affection.

It felt perfect.

They broke apart only to breathe before their lips sealed again. Hands wandered tentatively, neither willing to push too far and burst the bubble they were floating in. It was a moment of bliss they had both craved in the wake off all the anger and pain. That was it, though, it was only a moment of joy amongst the darkness that had become their lives and that reality forced Arizona to push back under the weight of her guilt.

"Calliope?"

"Hmm?" The buzz of their passion had numbed her lips.

"I'm sorry."

"I know."

She burrowed her face into the crook between her lover's neck and shoulder, taking comfort in the familiar feel of the soft skin. How had she ever turned her back on this? How had she ever pushed Callie away? She could ask herself over and over, blame it on PTSD or the medication she was on, but none of it would matter. The reason didn't matter now. What mattered was that she had her family back... and she was never letting go.

"Can we go home?"

Callie smiled as she pressed a kiss to Arizona's temple. "Yeah, baby, we can."

She helped her lover stand and watched as the injured woman tested placing her weight on the new leg. A surge of pride flowed through her veins as she watch the determination spread over Arizona's face - proud of her work and of her wife. Things were far from perfect, but this was their biggest step in the right direction. That alone brought a brilliant smile to her face.

"You shouldn't rely on it too much until Josh has worked with you more." Arizona nodded in agreement as she stared down at the leg. "Let me get your crutches. You can try walking on it with those."

It was only a matter of seconds before she felt the cushions under her arms and metal against both of her sides. They had become an accepted part of her new life, but as she lifted her eyes to meeting the loving gaze of her wife, she felt as if that new life might be something worth living. It has been a long road, endless nights of anger, tears, and lying awake, but they were standing together again.

It felt perfect.

"Ready?" She leaned into Callie to press a kiss to her cheek.

The Latina smiled, brushing their lips together in a chaste kiss before moving to stand beside her wife. She placed her right hand over her back, situating herself at Arizona's left side in a silent protective act that she had adopted routinely since the older woman started to walk again. It was gesture that had aggravated her wife in her blind rage, but now it warmed her heart.

"I love you, too."

That was the only answer Arizona needed to hear.


End file.
